BCEagle74's 2014 Summer School: "Reparative Therapy for EagleNation"

Three Credits. Tuition, $3,500.00, Donuts included. No Starbucks.

Course Curriculum:

  • Strategic Planning Meeting Organizational Behavior:

How to constantly smile like a true lackey, or your significant other is tickling you in your favorite spot, during Leadership meeting wrap-up speeches!

How to shower the Blue Ribbon hand-picked Gold Standard Committee with so many "atta boys" that you are always selected for the next project.

Group Hints: Like never eat the last Lobster Roll, but say you are wrapping it up for the homeless person and then make the secret switch with a stale sesame Conte Forum pretzel.

  • Learning to endure with Title Failure & Mediocrity with the other BC major sports except Ice Hockey:

So many historical soul snatching and heart crushing defeats like BC was born in the same epicenter twisted womb of Cubs fans and then separated at birth.

  • Debunking all the sad, pathetic and embarrassing carved in stone historical classic BC excuses

The best, weakling and impotent BC invented whine, "Oh, oh the neighbor’s" card.

Oh, academics.

Oh, admissions requirements.

Oh, we need so many more donations for new stadiums, arenas and facilities, or major renovations, even with a $2.5 Billion endowment.

Oh, if only we had more land, even though our 55 open flat acres in the heart of Boston on a T line and could fit 2 retractable domes.

Oh, if we could only tailgate like the other 130 schools with no armed rude guards because we really contribute nothing to the social, political, health, educational and economic impact of the entire area!

We are poor Jesuit Catholic’s and needless, mindless suffering for decades is a great sacrifice for eternity.

Oh, hard ice cold aluminum seats and no backs make you feel better.

Oh, I like to run down 5 flights of stairs and tinkle from my expensive PSL bench.

Eating stale disgusting sesame pretzels and bad vendor food takes years off of purgatory.

  • Your one requirement is a 5 page paper on the long term future benefits of:

The ultra super-secret master Strategic Plan to build a $1.2 Billion "Apple IWatch" sponsored retractable dome stadium seating 85,000 on St. John’s Brighton Campus!

Hint kids: When we open the Dome, the Baby Jesus can "IWatch" and give us a few in-game breaks if we all pray and look fervently up to Heaven's own blue.

Yes all, Professor BCEagle74, former Emeritus Eagle with double PHD's, is coming out of retirement to provide his personal spiritual inspiration from his humble genius and oracle like enlightenment.

No refunds. Cash only**.

**Inquire within for the discreet coed exchange discount from the special Texas Sugar Daddy scholarship program!

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